Maa…I Miss You
After a year of Misery, grief and pain, today I gathered my strength to pour my feelings into words. Recently a friend of mine lost her mother reason being Cancer, to which her body could not fight. Cancer the most dreadful disease to which my Maa also succumbed. When I was small if I scored less in exams, I used to think nothing more can happen then me getting beatings from Maa or Papa, and so many years have passed now and when anything bad happens I again think what more can happen. But I realized life follows its own course and worse can come in any form, I didn’t realize this until I lost my Mom a year back.
The pain was so inevitable I thought I can’t live with this, I cried for days and nights and I asked thousand times why this happened to us to me, to my siblings and moreover why my Papa had to loose his partner, his love, his life!!!!!! Still these questions hover over my mind and still I have no answers. Sometimes god behaves so strangely, he gives us Mother as he can’t be every where with us then why does he have to take back the most priced possession of a child, Maa!! Life since past 1year has changed a lot for me and my whole family. Our house doesn’t seem very welcoming without my Maa, but still we all try in our own ways to make it a special place to live, a place which my Maa dreamt of, full of love and care.
I used to think that something like this can never happen in my family, I knew that everybody has to go back to were he has come from, but as every child feels nothing can happen to my Parents same was my feeling. Suddenly not having my Mom with me shook all my beliefs and I realized the existence of Mother in my life. Since the day she is no more there have been so many incidences when I felt that some unknown energy is protecting me in adverse situations, I have felt a hand stopping me from falling, and my belief in her existence has come again. I know she is there beside me in every step I take and she protects me from this mean world every moment. Just a feeling that she is there has made my life a bit easy to live. I still remember the sweet smile on my mothers face as she slept with the pain away from her, resting in god’s arms. God needed another angel in the heavenly choir and that’s why she had to go. I never thought I would be comforting her, holding her hand and telling her not to worry.
She was a pillar of strength even until the end, fighting all life’s battles. She always reminded me to keep my faith in god and let god lead me on right path. I miss you more than these words could ever say. I am afraid of life now that you are gone because I always had a mother; I wish I would have got few more days, months, or years with you, I wish I would have prayed hard enough to make god give me my Maa back. Maa I will always walk on the right path taught by you and will continue to groom my soul; I will walk in footsteps you have walked before me. As now you sleep in the cradle of god, I am assured that when the gates of heaven open for me, I will see your smiling face, loving eyes, reunited once again we will be.
This blog is in remembrance of my Mom and a tribute to all the Mothers who had to leave their loved ones on earth and go to God because god needed them more. May there soul rest in Peace. May god give strength to one and all to fulfill the dreams of their Mothers. Love you Maa, May you be my Maa in all my lives.
Note- Trust me Parents are the best gift of god to a child, cherish them till the time they are alive. And Mother is the god’s closest angel which he sends on earth to protect and spread love to one and all. Till now if you have not acknowledged your love to your Mom, go and express, tell her she is so beautiful and how your life is worthless without her in it. My heartfelt bow to all the mothers!! Never do a deed which will make your parents feel that they have done something wrong by bringing you on this earth and given you a long life!!
After a year of Misery, grief and pain, today I gathered my strength to pour my feelings into words. Recently a friend of mine lost her mother reason being Cancer, to which her body could not fight. Cancer the most dreadful disease to which my Maa also succumbed. When I was small if I scored less in exams, I used to think nothing more can happen then me getting beatings from Maa or Papa, and so many years have passed now and when anything bad happens I again think what more can happen. But I realized life follows its own course and worse can come in any form, I didn’t realize this until I lost my Mom a year back.
The pain was so inevitable I thought I can’t live with this, I cried for days and nights and I asked thousand times why this happened to us to me, to my siblings and moreover why my Papa had to loose his partner, his love, his life!!!!!! Still these questions hover over my mind and still I have no answers. Sometimes god behaves so strangely, he gives us Mother as he can’t be every where with us then why does he have to take back the most priced possession of a child, Maa!! Life since past 1year has changed a lot for me and my whole family. Our house doesn’t seem very welcoming without my Maa, but still we all try in our own ways to make it a special place to live, a place which my Maa dreamt of, full of love and care.
I used to think that something like this can never happen in my family, I knew that everybody has to go back to were he has come from, but as every child feels nothing can happen to my Parents same was my feeling. Suddenly not having my Mom with me shook all my beliefs and I realized the existence of Mother in my life. Since the day she is no more there have been so many incidences when I felt that some unknown energy is protecting me in adverse situations, I have felt a hand stopping me from falling, and my belief in her existence has come again. I know she is there beside me in every step I take and she protects me from this mean world every moment. Just a feeling that she is there has made my life a bit easy to live. I still remember the sweet smile on my mothers face as she slept with the pain away from her, resting in god’s arms. God needed another angel in the heavenly choir and that’s why she had to go. I never thought I would be comforting her, holding her hand and telling her not to worry.
She was a pillar of strength even until the end, fighting all life’s battles. She always reminded me to keep my faith in god and let god lead me on right path. I miss you more than these words could ever say. I am afraid of life now that you are gone because I always had a mother; I wish I would have got few more days, months, or years with you, I wish I would have prayed hard enough to make god give me my Maa back. Maa I will always walk on the right path taught by you and will continue to groom my soul; I will walk in footsteps you have walked before me. As now you sleep in the cradle of god, I am assured that when the gates of heaven open for me, I will see your smiling face, loving eyes, reunited once again we will be.
This blog is in remembrance of my Mom and a tribute to all the Mothers who had to leave their loved ones on earth and go to God because god needed them more. May there soul rest in Peace. May god give strength to one and all to fulfill the dreams of their Mothers. Love you Maa, May you be my Maa in all my lives.
Note- Trust me Parents are the best gift of god to a child, cherish them till the time they are alive. And Mother is the god’s closest angel which he sends on earth to protect and spread love to one and all. Till now if you have not acknowledged your love to your Mom, go and express, tell her she is so beautiful and how your life is worthless without her in it. My heartfelt bow to all the mothers!! Never do a deed which will make your parents feel that they have done something wrong by bringing you on this earth and given you a long life!!
